Discipline Members Livestream

• there’s no sanskrit word for discipline

  • there’s a word for persistent effort, but not for discipline?
  • what does disciplined even mean?
  • the things that we think make us disciplined, require discipline to do
    • so how do you even start? its a catch 22

• What discipline really means

  • when we look at another person, we can make a judgement call if they’re disciplined or not
    • eating healthy, working out, working on their career, etc.
    • because they do those things consistently, we call them disciplined
    • these have to be in a “positive” direction
      • ex, if you were to do the same thing with gaming, watching youtube, etc. you wouldn’t call that discipline
      • imagine removing the “values” from it, a gamer would be next level discipline ‘sacrificing their social life, sleep, etc. all for their great purpose of advancing in this video game. look at how disciplined they are.’
  • appears to be consistent behavior that we like
  • when we look at behavior, there’s a big difference between what you see, and what you have to do on the inside

• Intrinsic vs perceived discipline

  • ex. “green thumb”
    • beautiful garden, big yields. while yours sucks.
    • what is green thumb?
      • an ignorant person’s observation of external things, then attribution to something abstracted
  • you can look at whats going on on the outside, but we can’t see what’s going on inside that person
  • so what goes on on the inside? read on.

• example: new years resolution

  • this year, I’m gonna do this! committing to exercising!
  • internally
    • we have excitement
    • our mind goes in a direction, so we make a commitment to that
    • what’s the goal of the commitment?
      • keep our mind focused in that way
      • duplicate that state of mind in the future

1. yogic perspective
   • hold the same thought in their mind for an extended period of time
   • degen gamer as disciplined
     • they’re constantly thinking about something
     • turning thinking into actions
       • the struggle with gaming/addictions starts with a thought: “man i wish I could X right now”
       • then, you struggle to prevent the action
   • the more focused your mind is, the more discipline you’ll be
     • “wow look at that person, they’re so disciplined, they’ve been studying for four hours”
       • this is all about focus for a long period of time
   • what about the inverse, undisciplined?
     • ex. going to the gym - jan 2nd “I’m gonna go to the gym”
       • then, jan 5th comes around and its “I should go to the gym”
         • but then the mind gets clouded with other things that you have to do, being tired, excuses around why you should take a break, etc.
     • discipline begins to decay when the mind becomes unfocused
   • looking at the mind - it has a lot of energy
     • those that aren’t productive have thoughts that are pulling in all different directions - mind is scattered
       • ex. ADHD and Discipline at other ends of the spectrum
     • vs. someone who has a single thought - that’s discipline
   • discipline is a focused mind
     • as long as your mind is focused on that thing - the behavior will follow
     • the more thoughts you have, the less disciplined you are

principle number 1: a focused mind will result in disciplined action over time

the neuroscience of focus → discipline

• when you’re struggling with discipline

  • you have a thought - go to the gym, but you also have a thought to play FF7
  • if you want to be practically disciplined,
    • a yogi would say to understand the conflict between those two thoughts - if you understand and dominate the conflict, you’ll win 100% of the time
  • what about willpower?
    • your desire is to play FF7, but you have to use willpower to counter your desire and go to the gym instead
    • the neuroscience
      • anterior cingulate cortex and frontal lobes are where our willpower comes from
      • its an exhaustible resource
      • the part of our brain that monitors conflict is the same as willpower, its the same part of the brain
        • we think that we just run out of willpower, but that’s not what happens
        • look at the subjective experience - when you have an internal conflict - theres a battle between should & want
          • the problem is that you throw in the towel
          • you know what you should do, but you feel yourself giving up a little bit
            • “yeah, not today”
          • then, you have the justification, excuses, etc.
          • but you lost the battle internally
          • the battle keeps going as long as there’s no resolution
            • the battle ends the moment there’s resolution between the two parts that are fighting, one part wins
            • we think we lose the battle, and then we let go of monitoring the conflict, but it’s flipped.
            • as long as you monitor the conflict, that’s what keeps the battle going
        • the monitoring of conflict is the same as exerting willpower
      • technique 1: monitor the conflict - don’t stop paying attention
        • as long as you sit down and monitor the conflict, not take any action, but just sit there, exerting willpower on monitoring, discipline will be growing
        • when you throw in the towel, that’s when things are done
        • you don’t have to win, just wait it out
        • giving up is synonyms with not paying attention
      • in order for this conflict to happen, there’s also the “desire” that we have to fight against
        • gym vs. FF7
          • the amount of willpower needed to go to the gym needs to be greater than the desire to play FF7, so the greater the desire to play FF7, the greater the willpower you’ll need in order to get yourself to go to the gym
          • discipline is easy when you don’t really care
        • it’s easy to be disciplined when you don’t really care, when desire is very low
          • it’s hard to be disciplined when you care a lot about the alternative
        • discipline is a versus game between willpower and desire, you can affect both variables
          • you can reduce desire
  • variable 2: reducing your desires
    • indrias - sensory organ
      • desires are born from the sense organs
        • why do people advertise? create thoughts.
        • ex. wanting to date someone depends on who you can see
          • you can only want to date someone who you can see on instagram, only people you can talk to
        • with sensory inputs come desires
      • so we need to control our indrias, our inputs
        • 1. reduce negative inputs
          • notifications, silence messages, etc. do the opposite of what the tech industry is doing
          • no face ID
          • manual login for negative things
          • add as many barriers as possible for us to access the negative thing. the easier that people want to make things for us, the harder we have to make it for ourselves
        • even somewhat benign inputs reduce willpower
          • relationship between eye, thalamus, and attention
            • your eye sees all kinds of things in your vision, lots of input. ex. 100 things you can see at any time and point
            • your thalamus presents only one thing to your attention. your brain is processing the other 99 things in the background, using a lot of processing power
          • when you reduce the clutter in your room, it makes it easier to focus
            • the load on your thalamus is reduced
          • the more you can clean up, the stronger your brain will be
          • when in your life have you been disciplined? what what the sensory input?
            • ex. easier to study at the library
        • 2. some amount of sensory input is necessary for some people to maintain focus
          • ex. people who have ADHD - music or white noise can help them
          • ex. some meditations have a half gaze
            • if you deprive the brain of sensory input, it will create its own sensory input
          • some people need a little bit of input in order to slightly stimulate their brain
          • indrias create thoughts, leading to desires
            • so, we can use this to our advantage to push us in the way that we want to go
            • ex. listening to “eye of the tiger” to get you pumped to go to the gym
          • what causes our mind to waver?
            • not just sensory input, also the thoughts themselves
            • whats the right level of indria input to engage your mind so your not distracted by thought
            • sense of smell is powerful for memories and experiences - ex. lighting the right incense
          • sangha - community - is a good source of positive indiras
            • HIIT is done in groups, community helps us stay discipline
          • if you give your mind the right kind of inputs, the right kind of actions will be easy

• currently have two thoughts - FF7 & gym - but if we’re able to create one thought - only going to the gym, then its easy

• what about habits?

  • one way we form action is through thinking
    • this is what advertising focuses on “if i control your thought, i control your actions”
  • with habits, there is automatic behavior
    • behavior without thought

vairygya - detachment

• care less about the thing that makes you undisciplined

  • personally this is what I did about video games

• if we control the attachment to the desire, then we make discipline way easier

  • less willpower needed because you just don’t care

• what deviates you from discilpine?

  • a desire to do something else
  • the more you want to do the desire, the harder discipline is
  • neuroscience
    • ex. an alcoholic’s pre-disposition for alcohol
      • nearly impossible for this person to be disciplined vs. a non-alcoholic’s ability to say no
    • nucleus accumbens
      • when dopamine gets released here, we get a feeling of pleasure
      • from that, we get behavioral reinforcement
      • and that will increase anticipation
      • the behavioral reinforcement and increased anticipation are the craving and desire to do something
    • cool trick (brain hack!)
      • when we engage in an activity that requires discipline, we don’t savor the rewards
      • ex. engage in fun activities after you do something hard
        • you engage in something difficult, ex. studying, then when you’re done, go to the joyful thing of relaxing, partying, etc.
      • this is separating out the joy from the work
      • what happens when the next test comes around?
        • you reinforced the behavior of feeling good - of doing the joyful things, not actually doing the studying
        • you associated the studyin gwith pain
      • so, savor the thing that you’re disciplined
        • when there’s something that you want to reinforce, sit down for 15 mins and appreciate it
        • not just “Oh thank god I’m done” and go to the next thing
        • give yourself internal rewards for doing the hard work, appreciate the work that you put in
        • instead, we normally just grab out phones after doing something hard, we’re enforcing the joyful thing of being on our phones, and not of putting the work in
        • what are you feeling? what are you grateful for that you did?
      • this will start to even out your desires between the thing that you want to be disciplined for, and the original thing you’re trying to avoid
        • the playing field starts to even out and you don’t need as much willpower to push you in the “right” direction
      • people who are disciplined, every day is not a struggle
        • its a struggle if you’re undisciplined

• as you detatch from the desire, it’ll be easier to be disciplined

  • when you have no desire, action is very easy
  • if no one cares, there’s no argument
  • simple way: analyze your desire
    • FMRI studies look at blood flow to areas of the brain
      • blood flow to the brain alters/changes
      • all parts of the brain are not equally subfused with blood
    • the part of your brain that enjoys something, the nuccleus accumbens is different from the part that analyzes something
      • ex. a joke is funny until you disect it
      • ex. enjoying a movie vs analyzing a movie
    • we love strong indira objects because we’re able to lose ourselves in them, like a great video game
    • if you want to kill a desire, analyze it. you can’t enjoy it and analyze it at the same time
      • there are of course some caveats here
    • “where does the joy from this come from? what do I enjoy about this?”
      • play the tape through “if i engage in ff7, how will i feel about myself tomorrow, an hour from now, etc.”
      • the gratification of most desires don’t resolve in long term satisfaction
    • “if i play this game today, what will my life be like tomorrow?”
      • your mind tries very hard to avoid this, forget about analyzing the conflict, because it wants the tasty neurochemicals from the desire
    • any time you engage in a desire, it isn’t going to satisfy you
      • tomorrow you’re going to want to play again, and the next day. until you finish the game
      • do you think after finishing the game, you’ll just be able to go out and do all of the productive things you should be doing?
        • nope. to the next game.
    • our brain is always shooting for homeostasis
      • desires are temporary, they come and go
      • you just have to ride it out, play the waiting game
      • like a seige, your desire will run out of food before you 100%
      • it’ll be really strong for a short amount of time to get you to cave, but they can’t play the long game

practices

• maintaining one pointedness in the mind
  • trataka - fixed point gazing
    • in order to see things, there’s a pigment that exhausted in our eyes
    • if we stare at something for a long period of time, the pigment in our eyes gets exhausted and we cant see it anymore
    • looking at different things regenerates those pigment
    • when we close our eyes…
  • antur trataka
    • we see a negative image of the thing we were looking at
    • it’s great because it requires the right level of focus to maintain
    • you need relaxed focus - just enough focus, but not too much, perfect level of focus
  • yantra trataka
    • the whole point of yantras
    • when we look at the colors of a yantra, then we close our eyes, we see a reverse of it
    • ishta devata - your god
      • if you want to cultivate a particular energy, you can choose one and do the accompanying yantra
  • any kind of dharana will do though
• how to analyze a desire and develop detachment
  • observe what it’d be like before, during, and after doing the thing
    • what is it like if you were to engage with the desire?
  • you’ll notice that as you observe, each part gets weakened, recruiting different parts of the brain
• appreciate the things that we’ve done
  • sit there after doing something hard and let it soak in
• mandala
  • helps you sublimate desire
  • we have desires due to outcomes
    • action: eat a cookie
    • outcome: feel good, tastes good
  • in order to train ourselves to get rid of the need for the outcome is to train ourselves to do useless things
  • make something beautiful
    • ex. rungoli - colored rice arangements
    • ex. sand garden
    • then destroy it
  • we want to do stuff for the sake of getting something
    • so instead, we need to practice doing something with no benefit
  • more hardcore
    • write a book, then delete it - one of Dr.K’s patients came up with this
      • deleting the first book made writing the next books became so much easier
  • “why tho”
    • exactly the point
    • what stops you from doing it?
      • an attachment to the thing
      • “its a waste”
        • yes
  • what keeps us from being disciplined?
    • we don’t want to be wasteful
    • your mind always tries to tell you to avoid being wasteful
      • you have to study for a test, but, you can do that tomorrow. you can have fun today. I don’t want to be wasteful, might as well get some pleasure today
    • no waste. optimize. productivity. no useless actions. don’t take a year off
  • optimizing for productivity will lead to procrastination
    • society has such a large emphasis on productivity, but the world is full of procrastination
    • acceptance - there’s a loss to be had
      • there’s no loss of efficiency
      • “i don’t think i can get into college so I’ll take a gap year and study this and that so i don’t waste my time”
      • what’s the point of taking a test if you’re going to fail and have to take it again
    • as we optimize for efficiency and productivity then we open the door to procrastination
      • instead of slaving away for 10 hours, might as well wait for the right time where it’d only take me four hours
    • this decays discipline
      • discipline is about waking up and doing the thing
    • mandala’s are a great way to

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gym vs ff7

• there’s desire on both side, how do we increase desire for the gym?
• 4 different things that create motivation in us
• loss vs gain, internal vs external quadrant
  • internal & gain - desire
    • internal benefit, and a gain, not a loss
  • internal & loss - duty/dharma
    • internal benefit, done for oneself, feel good about yourself, but it costs you
  • external & loss - shoulds
    • cost - have to sacrifice something
    • external - done for someone else or society “forces” you
  • external & gain - values
    • things that will benefit you - money, freedom, etc.
    • but its more about interaction with the external world?
• when it comes to discipline, you want duty and values
  • where within you is the “want” to go to the gym?
    • from people saying you should do it, or today i feel like working out?
      • these are fleeting
    • or is it duty to take care of your body, or valuing/caring about fitness
      • these will providing lasting discipline
• how do we move between the quadrants?
  • “i should work out everyday”
    • where does that come from - maybe social media
    • so what do you care about?
      • if you can dig into why
        • ex. “i feel embarrased by my body so I don’t join my friends on things like X & Y and I feel lonely and left out” or crushing on someone who goes to the gym
        • on a given day, what’s the pro and whats the con
          • “next time your friends ask, do you want to go to the beach? do you want to go hang out with your crush”
          • you’re understanding the cost of your inaction here
      • the more you lean into duty & values, the better off you’ll be
        • rather than shoulds and wants (those will never make you disciplined)
        • how do people become disciplined?
          • they made it about themselves
          • they find a good enough reason
          • have an important “why”

Habits & habit Formation

• discipline is usually about consistent action, but not necessarily consistent struggle
  • the way to act without effort is habit
  • take between 2-4 weeks to form
    • we want to create a situation where it is easy to stick to for 2-4 weeks
      • 25% rule
        • imagine the habit you want, then cut it in half twice
        • goal: 20min meditation daily = 5min meditation daily
    • for first 2 weeks, you do it no matter what
      • “i don’t want to do this forever” - you trick yourself into a large timescale
        • so, just focus on the 2-4 weeks, then you can give up
  • anchor it to an existing habit
    • ex. tkaing pills after brushing teeht, picking up mail after you get home
  • smooth the path
    • look at the things that will make the habit difficult, and remove them
    • 3 pill bottles is more difficult to open everyday than filling a daily pill box once a week
    • set yourself up for success, make it easy
  • study the habit
    • any time you fail, do an autopsy
    • where did you screw up, what happened, what could you do better
  • habit circuity is formed in the endo canabanoid system
    • no mary jane
    • people who regularly use marijuana have a hard time forming habits

accountability

• ex. when someone is held accountable for their actions, fines they have to pay or whatever
• only applies when someone doesn’t want to be held accountable
  • one party wants it and the other doesn’t
• “i want to hold myself accountable”
  • what does it mean?
    • today’s version of you wants to hold tomorrow you accountable to do something
• its your attempt to control yourself
• it means there’s a part of you that doesn’t want it
  • a house divided among itself cannot stand
• “holding accountable”
  • not “inviting” but “holding”, forceful etc.
• never been a yogic text about holding accountability

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if you really want to be disciplined, you have to recreate the person who you are today

• recreate the person who creates the commitment
• why is life hard? why’s the world difficult?
  • present you doesn’t care about future you
  • why we procrastinate - the person who has to do 8 hours of studying isn’t the same person as today
• why do we need accountability?
  • because we wake up as different people every day
  • accountability is attachment to present self
    • “i want to be this person for the rest of the year, month, whatever”
    • the whole point is that the present changes, life flows, all that exists is the pressent
    • holding onto a desire from the past doesn’t work.
  • how do you act in the same way every day?
    • time to talk about karma and emotional kindling

Recreate the person that you are today

• the person you are today is born from your past karma
  • ex. why are you upset?
    • I got a D and have to retake the class, wish i could hold myself accountabile
    • its born of frustration
    • if you want to recreate this person, what do you need to do?
      • when you get frustrated with yourself, what led up to that frustration that you wanted to hold youself accountable for?
      • if you had to recreate it, get another D. that’s how you got here
    • but it doesn’t work, because you’re not that person tomorrow
• if you did something good today, you want to continue doing it, what are the factors that went into it?
  • who we are in the current moment is a consequence of your karma
  • the actions & choice you make today will create the person you are tomorrow
  • if you want to be disciplined
    • if today you don’t want to play ff7 and instead work on your resume
    • simple question: how do you want to wake up tomorrow?
      • do you want to wake up having completed your resume, or be looming ahead of you
      • you have the choice in this moment to fuck yourself over or to give yourself a gift
    • we never think like this
      • it knows it can make excuses and win, to conserve energy, to get the dopamine, to be lazy
  • then you wake up the next day angry with yourself, needing to “hold yourself accountable”
  • you only hold yourself accountable for doing the wrong thing, how is it that you get yourself to just do the right thing instead?
• every day you are sewing a karma
  • whatever you feed in your mind will grow
  • neurons that fire together wire together
    • automatic thoughts
    • people that behave like bots
  • mental karma
    • how did you sleep the day before, how did you eat?
• indria drains - people
  • the wrong kind of person can weigh you down

emotional kindling

• peoplpe who are highly disciplined kindle the right emotions
• emotions go to homeostasis
  • when we make a big commitment, we feel good about it, so we make a huge promise
  • then we want to hold ourself accountable, and we force ourself to go to the gym
  • you can’t force yourself
  • but you can kindle the right emotions
• look at your life and see what creates the right emotions
  • how can you cultivate the person you are today for a better tomorrow
• connects back to sitting down and appreciating what you do
• obesitiy & adhd
  • intense craving, but dopamine release is lower than normal
  • hunger is twice as strong, but dopamine is half as good
  • so: learn to savor
    • don’t eat while watching tv
• what can you do today to kindle positive emotions tomorrow
• playing video games today
  • what will happen to you tomorrow? or the end of the day?
  • guilty, frustrated, then you want justice
    • hold accountable!
    • but where’s your mind? remember dharna, single focus. Is your mind focused at the task on hand? no!
    • you’re not doing the task, you’re focused on being accountable

cultivate the state of your environment

• you can wake up today and be disciplined
• discipline is the flower, not the stem or the leaf or the root
  • its what we see at the end
• but the flower is born from beneath the soil
  • kindle the right emotions
  • people who make you feel the right way
• 2 ways to wake up
  • “why didn’t i do more yesterday”
  • “i’m already halfway done”
  • which life do you want to inherit tomorrow?
• the person who is disciplined is passing on a good inheritance for tomorrow
  • undisciplned - fuck it, they can fend for themselves

Anushtanam

• meditative commitment - 40 day practice
• ex. 108 malas total

Dr.K’s outline:

• What discipline really means
• Intrinsic vs perceived discipline
  • Internal action
  • Trying to act disciplined by copying others doesn’t work because discipline comes from your own thoughts and feelings 
• Practical aspects of discipline, understanding the underlying practices that can help foster this skills
• Various points of view on discipline
• What is discipline? 
• Focus, Dharana, the practice of holding one’s mind in a one-pointed manner, is crucial to discipline 
  • See this kind of focus in “undisciplined” behaviors like video game addiction
• Neuroscience of discipline
  • Involves brain’s monitoring systems (PCC/ACC) that manage internal conflict and will power → parts that help us deal with wanting to give up or continue
• The right environment and control over sensory input (indriyas) are essential to maintaining focus and reducing distractions. 
  • Take care of the things around you and what you take in
• Detaching from distractions involves understanding and reducing the attachment to things that compete with our goals
  • Sometimes you have to lessen the importance of other things that might get in the way → reducing attachment to video game to focus on something else
• True discipline aligns with our deepest values and requires honest introspection to move beyond “shoulds” to what truly matters to us. 
  • Need to truly care about something, it’s about what matters most to you, not just what you think “should” matter to you. 
• Habit formation
• Emotional Kindling
• Anushtanam